A husband desperate to end an argument offers to buy is wife a new diamond ring. She curtly declines his offer by saying, That’s not quite what I had in mind.

Frantically he offers her a new house. Again she rejects his offer, That’s not quite what I had in mind.

Curious, he asks What did you have in mind?

She retorts, I’d like a divorce.

He answers, I hadn’t planned on spending quite that much.