Blonde and Brunette
Q: If a blonde and a brunette are tossed off a building, who hits the ground first?
A: The brunette. The blonde has to stop to ask for directions.
Q: If a blonde and a brunette are tossed off a building, who hits the ground first?
A: The brunette. The blonde has to stop to ask for directions.
A man walks into a bar and he’s really pissed. The bartender gives him a drink and asks what the problem is. All he says is, “All lawyers are assholes.” A man sitting in the corner shouts, “I take offense to that!”
The pissed-off guy asks him, “Why? Are you a lawyer?”
He replies, “No, I’m an asshole.”
A little kid walks into a city bus and sits right behind the driver and starts yelling, ”If my dad was a bull and my mom a cow I’d be a little bull.” The driver starts getting mad at the noisy kid, who continues with, ”If my dad was an elephant and my mom a girl elephant I would be a little elephant.”
The kid goes on with several animals until the bus driver gets angry and yells at the kid, ”What if your dad was gay and your mom was a prostitute?!”
The kid smiles and says, ”I would be a bus driver!”
When a man talks dirty to a woman, it’s sexual harassment.
When a woman talks dirty to a man, it’s $3.95 per minute.
Son on his honeymoon phoned his mom asking what to do.
MOM: Put your biggest thing on her hairiest thing.
SON: got my nose in her armpit. Now what?